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When we met, I had pretty much given up — not in a resigned, self-pitying way; my attitude was that online dating was wasting too much of my time and energy, with unsatisfactory results, so I was going to keep myself open to romantic possibility, but not actively pursue finding someone.Then I met this dude — we went for coffee, and I was surprised at the ease of our conversation, and we kept seeing each other and it kept being really nice.

“Contacting someone is like losing power, so no-one wants to seem eager.I was also spoiled by the Ex (a three-year remove has allowed me to acknowledge some of the positives of our failed relationship) in that he was extremely articulate and communicative.He sent me daily, multi-paragraph emails full of cute details and in-jokes.Enjoy the after-glow of your first date, but don’t extrapolate that to indicate a lifetime of marital bliss.So you know it’s important to keep a lid on it, now you need to learn how.

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